Waterfall

08 April 2003

 

Waterfall

 

Gentle

 cascade,

  quiet

   lullaby,

    endlessly

     fascinating,

      soothing,

       calming,

        never stagnant,

 

Life:

 inhale;

  exhale …

   rhythm,

    symphony,

     hidden

      silence

       within.

Withheld from all

13 July 2002

 

Withheld from all –

quietly shattered,

protected from prying intrusions,

guarded stringently with an almost paranoid diligence,

            to even name it creates risk.

 

I can see it –

excavating layer after layer of pretense and illusion,

stripping away masks, disguises, costumes,

vainly attempting to reach that inner core,

that marrow of uniqueness that defines.

 

I can hear it –

snatches, whispers, murmurs, echoes,

an inconsistent interrupted stream of schizophrenic cacophony,

often uninvited and easily suppressed.

 

I can smell it –

breathe deep the pheromones of personality

despite the scent that lingers and continuously changes,

the essence of memory and movement.

 

I can taste it –

mirrored reflections of bitter, salty, sweet, and sour,

my insatiable hunger and uncompromising thirst.

 

I can feel it –

an undeniable portrait, a multi-faceted riddle,

fading and reforming like an imagined phantasm

clothed in a robe of undulating truth and untruth.

 

Emotional, physical, spiritual,

how many pieces must I name before I define who I am?

 

Withheld from all in part –

yet, unexaggerated thievery erodes

stolen moments, my thoughts, experiences, unrecoverable and irreplaceable

bits and pieces claimed by every soul that’s crossed my path.

I am repeatedly robbed of a single grain of quintessence

until this inner turmoil of loneliness and emptiness,

this failure to claim myself,

drives me beyond the brink of absorption

into the all-encompassing nothingness…

Voices kneeling

12 April 2002

 

Voices kneeling,

approaching eccentricity,

 

water’s utterances, drifting

like rogue questions.

 

A momentary yearning,

focused,

 

crackling insensitivity,

belief without nuance,

 

listening to tranquility,

echoes from the deepest within.

Unmistakable clarity

16 January 2001

 

Unmistakable clarity –

anvil voices sing,

tales of greenish insight,

untouched, virgin words

flowering through the silence…

 

Unappreciated –

reminiscent whining,

            …ignored,

                        unnoticed,

            disdained…

half-forgotten yearnings

willfully withheld,

too bruised by vain attempts.

 

Ever seeking a delicate balance –

 

            revelation       and      restriction,

            vulnerability    and      defense,

            open               and      closed,

            connection     and      chasm,

            reaching         and      withdrawal,

            ebb                 and      flow.

I am passing through this annihilation zone

17 November 2000

 

I am passing through this annihilation zone,

chained by a cruel intention,

restrained by filthy quiet,

keeping blindness starving.

 

Wilderness hunger

sprinkled with nomad dust.

 

Playful quiet optical voices,

manipulates blindness

until a cruel unveiling.

 

Unveiled voices of annihilation

sprinkle me with blindness dust.

 

I cannot bear to see and hear

the filthy manipulative quiet.

Groping blindly

20 June 2000

 

groping blindly –

like a moth, irresistibly drawn to a flame,

I listen in circles

to endless walls

and never discover the overhead doorway.

 

Lift high the misery torch,

self-appointed sentinel of solitude.

Burn away the dross of this

caressing fog,

this invisible misery.

 

Escape the gauntlet

of the whisper jungle —

someday,

            somewhere,

                        somehow,

I will know.

Whisper young

20 June 2000

 

Whisper young…

while you are still allowed

 

before the inside eclipse darkens

before the misery anchor drags and holds

before the caressing growl of opinion silences

before the invisible fog settles

before the rendezvous with the jungle of nobility

before the sensing torch uncovers vexing shadows

before the kiss lingering drowns

 

Whisper young…

while you are still allowed.

Perched beneath the answer canopy

02 May 2000

 

Perched beneath the answer canopy,

around the unveiling kettle,

I wait for a quieter invitation.

 

Scented noise,

delirious flight,

mental hum,

graceful joust,

inside,

below …

 

Optimistic ,

until the moment,

failure to

rouse quieter shadows.

Once, with another woman

26 April 2004

 Once, with another woman

 my heart beat faster whenever I saw you,

my breath was stolen each time you’d smile,

 

my fingers trembled as they fell through your hair,

my ears were enraptured at each and every word,

 

my eyes never tired … discover, explore, devour,

my soul was captured, enlarged and intertwined

 

once, with another woman

 

“I used to…” haunts with sadness and regrets

I change, you change, we change

 

I remember, rather than recreate, patterns,

habits interwoven on the loom of Time

 

Sometimes the way things used to be

unfair, cruel, and pointless

 

And so I silently dwell on what once was,

Privileged, now as then, by memories that whisper

 

once, with another woman