Purple's Platitudes

nothing but words …

Beast

14 April 2013

Beast

 

All the things I said I could do,

those things I said I choose not to,

were not lies, they were not just words

but I’ve become the angry beast

who can see only his own pain,

who lashes out, even at love.

 

I recoil at who I see now,

knowing it is not who I am,

knowing fear drives you farther off.

Where is the kindness, the respect,

the depth of love we believed in?

How can I treat you as I am?

 

I don’t even know who I am

or why I have become like this,

consumed by what I am feeling.

I growl and snarl at who I love,

then beg that you will forgive me

as I pledge that my love is still true.

 

In quiet hidden moments still,

my heart’s concerned for only you,

but that gets buried and denied.

I’m not supposed to love you now,

I’ve let it all be about me,

but it never has been that way.

 

I cry and grieve, try to pretend,

you do not matter to me now.

I hide the truth behind my masks.

How can we ever just be friends,

when what we have is so much more?

Your choice is made to not pursue,

 

but there’s no switch to just turn off.

How do we love and yet not love,

even if it’s not what we both want?

All we have done up to this point,

by sharing hearts is fall in love,

how will we stay, yet never not?

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14 April, 2013 - Posted by | Poetry |

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